it's like the past few days in trail mix form

The past fews days in weird word blurbs which I will explain later:

1- This is what I want to know: how come we never hear the story about Little Red Riding Hood's Mother? What about her side of it? Standing on the doorstep, watching Little Red as she disappears round the bend into the dark woods. Heart beating, hands wringing, hyperventilating, completely powerless, frozen on the doorstep. What the hell was the matter with her? Letting her defenseless child walk through the woods by herself with a maniac wolf on the loose? She knew full well that forest was ful of wolves, and but she sent her out there with a basketful of bait! "Stay on the path", like that's going to save her. It's almost like she wanted Little Red out of the way. . . . Maybe she couldn't stand the pressure of living in the woods anymore, the isolation, doing nothing but baking cookies for her sick mother. And you never hear about that relationship. Why doesn'y she visit her sick mother herself? And where was Little Red's father? No one ever addresses that. And what about the woodcutter? A strange man in the woods with an axe. Why does everyone automatically trust him? It's a frightening story.

2- Uno due, dove il bue?
Tre, Quattro, Tutto fatto
Cinque, Sei, Que fa lei?
Sette, Otto, Il pollo e cotto
Nove, Dieci, Quanti greci?
Undici, Dodoci, Prezzi Modici
Tredici Quattordici, Niente Medici!
Quindici, Sedici, Attente alle Forbici!
Diciasette, Diciotto, Vinco al Loto!
Diciannove, Venti, Puisci i denti!

3- A- "The frisky, it went away..."
B- "'Cause did I mention that 'Rocket Gum' is bubble gum but nstead of blowing bubbles it releases helium that shoot the chewer into space?"

4- I'm really excited for bowling team.

OK, so I lost steam at the end, but #4 is as important, maybe even more important than #1. And speaking of #1, here's what that totally random passage about Little Red Riding Hood, and the others, means:

1- I've been toying with the idea of auditioning for the fall play for a while, and the other day, I commited to it. I've picked out a monologue, which is what #1 really is, and I've started to memorize it. I know I should be, but I'm not that optimistic about my chances of actually getting a part in the play, which is "And Then There Were None" (which is a totally cool play to do), but after my stunning defeat in last springs elections, I'm not really sure I'm that good at anything. Except for doing global homework: today my global teacher told me he's never seen homeworks as thorough as mine. And he said I'm one of the best students in class (I got a 93 on last weeks test!!). Wow, that paragraph went from monologues to academics in 3.2 seconds flat. Now you know what my thoughts in my head are like.

2- That stupid Italian rhyme/song thing. It's been in my head all day today and yesterday, and it just won't go away. Besides the point that the line for eleven and twelve always makes me thinkof pretzels, the little rhymes have nothing to do with anything. Seriously. Here's the "rhyme" in English:

One two, where's the bull?
Three four, all done.
Five six, what are you doing?
Seven eight, the chicken's cooked
Nine ten, so many Greeks!! (Im still trying to figure out whether this is racist or not)
Eleven twelve, moderate prices.
Thirteen fourteen, no doctor,
Fifteen sixteen, Careful with the scissors
Seventeen eighteen, I won the lottery
Nineteen twenty, Brush your teeth

Is that not the most mindless thing you've ever heard. [And please, if it isn't, please tell me what is the most mindless thing you've ever heard.]

3- Tuesday night is the best night of the week, especially this past Tuesday night. Why? Because two of the best shows on television are on:

A. House. I didn't get to watch the entire episode because of show B, but what I did see was pretty funny, and classic House. I want to be House when I grow up. Seriously, cane et al.

B. Gilmore Girls, and the season premier, no less. It was chock full o' drama, as usual, and was an amazing episode. It had plot twists and still retained the witty banter and quirkiness that we've all grown to love.

House is going on a break until Haloween because of baseball playoffs, but thats OK with me because I care about baseball [the Mets have really been pissing me off recently, but they are still in the playoffs] and it gives me more time to get DVR.

4- Bowling is by far my most favorite sport/pastime ever. And I'm pretty good at it. I'm not amazingly fabulous at it, no 300 games or anything, but I've still got a solid 115 average, which is more than most people can say. Plus it's fun. So of course I'm trying out for the bowling team, and I'm pretty sure I'll at least make JV. And once I do make it, it gives me the perfect chance to converse with my new target of affection, who's on the bowling team. Oh, what irony! And this is a guy who'll actually talk to me. I might have more than a one-in-a-million chance. So i'd say I'm very excited for bowling team.

Now, I've got a quiz in History tomorrow, and now that I've got a reputation to uphold, I should probably start studying.